vonkoh
18th february 1986
vonkoh@hotmail.com
singaporean
WORK BEST WITH MOZILLA FIREFOX. (:
OTHERS
pots of gold.
diamonds.
pradas.
coachs.
taroting.
jade bangle.
jade chinese seal.
wii plus ddr mats.
pretty were the distortions.
importance were the
weals and woes.
fuck the nutcases.
the key to euphorias.
now, the many who are no
longer playing by the rules.
i never promise you a
happy ending,
you never said you wouldnt
make me cry.
keep me in your heart for
a while more.
;the shops.
Addictive Shopping
Las.Costuras*
;the often-reads.
DesktopTwo
Funshion
GutterUncensored
ieat.ishoot.ipost
Luxury Insider
ShoppingLifestyle Magazine
StyleNetwork
;the exits.
abbey
abbey's zorpia
aiwei
charmaine chan
chin pei
christina hoh
christina won
christina won's zorpia
daphne
elisa
esther's zorpia
eugene
geraldine
han tiong
hui juan
jen's zorpia
jessica
joyce
kelly
krystel
lishan
michelle
nicky
stuart
tabitha
teresa
xinping
yvonne chen
yvonne-smss junior
yvonne-polymate
blogger
blogskins
haloscan
Vanilla Designs\brushes
Corbis\pictures
sixseven\current layout html
folioplanet\i forgot which illustrator
August 2006
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when its gone, we just cant chase it back.
no matter how much effort we went all
out just to chase that wee bits.
i used to embrace everything i love that
comes my way; and even pretend to enjoy
the things i dont really like, and then try
to reject the ones i abhor.
running away from facts, while trying to
stay clear minded in reality.
no, not much problems at all; ive
almost forgotten what am i fighting for.
i needa get it right again;
honestly speaking, im just afraid to welcome
my future these days.
i cant waste time so give it a moment
i realised that nothing's broken
no need to worry about everything ive done
live every second like it was my last one
dont look back got a new direction
i love you once
needed protection
just like a tattoo.
okay,im very tired and i can hardly remember
much of what had happened for the whole of
my today.
but, met up with the girls tonight.
i prolly cannot find any others to make me
reveal my true self in front of them instead of
that stern image i give people. i had a real good
laugh tonight with them of course.
after which, cabbed down to look for my parents
from tampines. and guess what the uncle told me?
(prolly the uncle was just teasing me.)
uncle: "you from SQ? just finished work?"
me: "from SQ? no la, rejected from SQ."
uncle: "you should try again la, you will qualify la."
deep down i was like,"thanks ah."
somehow or rather, i dont realy like the attitude
of the stewards/stewardesses already. so was that
a compliment, or insult eh.
okay, just as i feel that time is always ticking
away intensively and i hate it when i dont
make enough appointments these days.
learnt a lot from the books that i have with
me but, not applying what i learnt was the
worse thing thats happening.
for example a lot of people take a lifetime to
earn their one million, and since im given the
opportunity to earn that amount within a few
years for as long as my time is fully utilised,
like a why not? just do it today rather than
giving in to the procrastination syndrome.
numbers are taking my mind off somewhere
now and im still trying to make out something
out of all these thoughts.
anyway, caught this show on the television and
i feel that its pretty inspiring.
'The Pursuit of Happyness" by Will Smith. a
movie of 2006 though.
its based on a true story, (Smith) is a
struggling salesman going through great
lengths to convince hospitals to buy this
portable bone density scanners. however,
after investing in this business venture,
both himself and his wife can barely make
ends meet.
the most important to (smith) is his son.
however, the wife decided to leave him as
shes has had enough and fed up with (smith)'s
repeated failures in selling his scanners. the
only problem he has was the wife wants
to take his son.
one day, during a discussion with his son,
(smith) explains his nickname from grade
school was 'Ten-Gallon Head'. he tells his
son that he was called that because of his
texas upbringing and intelligence. with this
in mind, (smith) finds an opportunity to work
as a stockbroker for a brokerage firm. although
its only an internship, he knows that he is a
genius with numbers and could win the broker
position when the internship is over, against
the others in this course.
(smith) then begins to stand outside of the
brokerage firm with his bone density scanner
(which at this point he is still trying to sell)
until one of the executives offers to talk to him.
one finally does, and (smith) showed him how to
solve the rubik's cube in a minute. the executive
is impressed and invites him for the internship.
meanwhile, (smith) continues to sell his scanners
to eat and pay rents.
throughout the film, (smith) experiences many
battles in finding a place to live, find food to eat
and getting to work on time without a car.
its a lovely movie, though throughout the film
you cant help to feel sympathy for both (smith)
and his son.
and i like its bottom line to viewers, happiness
is more than just a state of being - it is a
goal, a finish line.
a constant reminder than any person
who dares to despite all odds, has the
probability to make it. and that at the end
of the day, a penniless salesman with such
determination, willpower, dignity, courage and
hope could really stand out and win over the
mediocre.
just felt that all of us are always seeking for
something better but the effort of making that
every good thing possible aint as hard as those
who are trying to make money to meet ends kind.
just felt that we are lucky because shelter provided.
occasionally juggling between that 'bread and butter'
or 'love' thingy. in fact, we are wasting time. just like
what i am doing now blogging away just because i
feel like it. ((:
checking out the numbers i have. i have not 
okay, shall just keep it sweet and simple.
apart from work, im glad i called my
caretaker clique out for our usual chomp
chomp nights since i havent seen them
for some time; and my dearest jinyi.
she have become so naughty; but im so
happy to know that before she leaves the
house, she told the mother that shes meeting her
favourite friend (ME!). hahs.
so sweet of the little girl. but i was a little
too tired to entertain her, she became so
darn hyper plus a little violent these days.
below are some pictures of the little girl who
did signs of 1 to 10. joyce and teresa were like
teaching her how to do it while the poor girl
was having some difficulties with her fingers.
only one.
two is just me and you.
three's a crowd.
four deserves a salute from me.
my five goes up high.
six gives me a mask for any costumes parties.
i want a guy whos as cool as 00seven.
eight triggers my in-built loudspeaker.
ten gives me a pretty flower that makes me
joyce and teresa were like darn tired when jinyi
she have grown up so much that i can no
eugene the thailand boy was entertaining jinyi
and of course, im gonna turn her into another
she loves igallop.
okay, i know this look wrong.
ever since the goat joined NS, i doubt he have
we were all dog tired yet jinyi's energy level just
okay,i know the picture aint clear. but this
anyway, time to sleep.
work is such a battle.
as everybody knows, my computer have many
folders just like if they were to be physical files,
that would be the way i would file them.
my photo folders are growing tremendously
faster than the other folders. and of course, with
this woman around. im never failed to be flooded
with (more) new pictures.
camwhore-streaming; the girls gone mad! ((:
okay,im seriously lack of sleep and im
so in a rush for work because i woke
up late. reason being, i didnt be good
and went out for overnight mahjong
session. was thinking like since i dont
feel tired, perhaps a night of mahjong
gonna make me feel tired and adjust
my timing back for my weekdays.
now, i just need some verbal diarrhea
due to long hours of shutness in me. and
i simply hate to have tolerated it.
friend, because i take you as a friend i
dont mind sacrificing my sleep just for
mahjong session. i have no care about
whether i lose money or not. and ive
mentioned before i dont like it when
somebody get noisy when they win and
have this longy-face when they lose. once
is enough. and if you so dont appreciate it;
trust me, its the last time. and if you dont
think im being appreciative as well, count
me out then.
dont even come and give me some bullshit
when im the one sitting in the cab like an
idiot in the middle of the night when the
address given in the msg wasnt even clear.
what makes you so sure its the cab driver
whos stupid or is it the person who gave the
address doesnt even know exactly where
the place is. so dont think raising some voice
over the phone could help the uncle reach the
location with just road name and block without
some street number or avenue.
what added on to the fury in me wasnt even
just this. it was that "trying hard to be" attitude
that i just cant take it. whether you get it or not,
just dont step on my tail anymore before it was
only a mere anger i shown the other day. dont
test my patience or even my so-called tolerance
level - I DONT THINK I HAVE MUCH LEFT.
i just heard this very interesting comment and
thought it was like a steorotyping - rather, a very
childish steorotype.
"in future if you all were to buy house never
stay a in 3-room flat. because most of them are like
those who create a lot of trouble, take drugs and
such."
come on, staying in a 4 or 5-room flat doesnt make
much difference because we are all singaporeans!
what makes you think those people like you make
very much difference for trying to 'act class' there.
okay,perhaps lesser demerits in school, following
closely to the government structural programme
for life, least seen by principals, disciplinery masters
or mistress, or some polices? from what i see,i think
that person was just trying to push herself up
there somewhere but hanging out of nowhere - this
is the kind of attitude i see.
dont tell me in families of those who stay in 4 to 5-
room flat, condo or landed doesnt have kids who
might be led astray and then end up extending
somewhere with their so-called bad influence.
hello! if you are going to be a teacher! wise up
please. who are you to judge the poor kids whose
families cant even provide for them to stay in what?
a 5-room flat so that they could mix with those
higher class kids? how high class can your 4 - 5
room kids be?
okay, either i just dont like that person or i just
dont like it when such senseless sentence was
being made. im staying a 5-room so what? thats
because my family includes my parents and the
other two sisters!
its either a rich dad or poor dad who make out
the next generation. no point studying so much
without knowing what are proper morals in this
society. morals isnt just about how you behave
darling. its whats inside you thats reflected on
the outside in your daily activities, be it in the
day or night, exposed or concealed scenes.
we are young adults. and i have my own bloody
freedom of speech. if whatever that comes out
from my mouth in our casual talks doesnt please
you or your friends, why not just count me out.
because i feel that "bloody different league".
i know my limits to whatever i can or have to say;
so dont come giving me all that "shh", "dont like
that", "didnt i tell you not to this or that". now
its fucking irritating. im not one of your kids and
i dont have to be disciplined.
and who cares if there are more female smokers
around or vice versa. if you have problems with it;
by all means write a petition and hand it to some
department and prolly they will ban smoking. so
teachers can be proper teachers, cant smoke cant
hurl simple vulgarities like 'fuck'. whats so wrong
about that? tell me about it.
oh yes, teachers aint humans already. they are in
the process of transformation or programming
these people how to be a good example, what to do
is then right?
if these are the kind of teachers my kids are gonna
get in future, i would rather send my kids overseas.
because they gotta learn what is an open mind, not
narrow mindedness. its a bigger picture you see, not
trying to correct some small steps with one or two
wrong steps taken while making some hoohaa about
it. wanna be perfect, do it all nicely. dont perfect a little
bit here and there like doesnt practice what was
preached. because too much of it like that just gets on
my nerves darn badly.
seriously, if this is crude. come'on, mix with people
from monastery, they are the kind of breed you 'people'
should mingle with.
and now,i prolly gotta go ask my god for forgiveness
for having said the word 'fuck' in front of some highly
self-esteemed individuals and having so much
complains when im not behaving well.
whatever i said above might be offensive or perhaps lose
that so-called friendship that have been built up over
all these years. but; if i were to keep quiet about it and
even had it ignored, thats means that person meant nothing.
past two days was like shit,been trying .jpg)
and my socalled FRIEND called me up to
anyway, met up with the girls in the night;.jpg)
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this neoprint machine has its step like .jpg)
trust me,i hate that 'five' thingy..jpg)
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the same old happy days with the girls! (:
and so while waiting for photos to be printed.
the second machine we used gave us headache;
lastly,aint muffin madly-cute?
its a superduperhyper mad dog.
because; like owner, like dog. ((:
decided to dedicate the whole of today 
days we used to go sentosa so often.
was browsing the website drugstore, thought
i was looking for some feminine personal care 
i read the reviews and its average review score
initially was a cap contraceptive. now, they have
was thinking about all the jobs i worked
before; all my part time jobs and my current
job, the only full time.
from secret recipe, being able to learn how
to do simple chores and most importantly,
interest me to cook and do drinks when i
want to. those are simple things yet i was
so spoilt that i didnt know what chores were.
after which was another f&b at this vietnamese
restuarant. it was so relaxed that i didnt know
it was work.
somehow or rather, ended up working as a tutor.
i must say i hate being a tutor, either im not
patient enough, or im just not cut out to coach. (:
a note to people who wants to hire tutors, please
go to those recognised tutor centres or approach
those you know who really have qualifications.
ive forgotten where did i even get the number
of the tutor company i was under. trust me, most
of them lie about the qualifications of their tutors.
they simply just chunk any tutors to you saying
that they hold certain high qualifications. i was
uncomfortable tutoring prolly because they lied
about me graduating from some uni and thats why
i was coaching a couple of secondary school students,
one of them was from express stream.
then i had my internship as an accounts assistant,
it was prolly the most horrid period but i missed
the chance to enjoy my time there. i could have
had my fair share of fun.
accounting was a little dead because im like facing
the computer most of the time. if not, i would be
doing some admin which almost kill me. admin
work like filing and all. i guess its the admin part
that kills my interest in working the usual nine
to five.
i always complain about jobs being too routinised.
but its good to have a routine job, because its
disciplining you at the same time. so i wonder, if
im the deskbound kind of person. but can you
imagine i can doze off while trying to do some
accounts for the commercial company? either it
was not challenging or pressing enough for me
to stay awake, or, im just too 'active'.
and so before i graduate from poly, i was asked
if i can help out for Skinfood for a week. got to
know the salesgirl from biotherm and after that
one week, i went for interview and start working
for them. biotherm, though they pay a meagre
hourly salary, but thats when i feel that sales jobs
are the best. because they come with commissions.
and i thought selling wasnt all that difficult. but as
time passed, the job get kinda boring already. sitting
by the counters hoping that some fishes will come
to us so that we are able to earn extra comm. do the
unpackings, tagging, keying in sales and some
cleaning, thats all.
somehow or rather, wonder why did i even got
myself working at pubs. it was prolly the best
time because i can earn money and play at the
same time. but night jobs aint some place to stay
for long. i had played so much in the past to the
extend i no longer have the interest to pub or
even club anymore. which is good, because im
looking for some other healthier activities.
and now, here i am in insurance line. work is
totally different and i gotta learn a lot of things
that i had never expect myself to do. i had this
friend who told me insurance is a very saturated
market, but i think otherwise. he said that prolly
because he tried to recruite me for some other job.
this job can be fun though, always must interact
with people. sometimes its as though you are
working the full twentyfour hours. i remember
vividly that i was so busy for this week that for
most of the days for that particular week, i dont
even have the time to blank that half an hour for
a meal break. the kind of job i enjoy when im busy
enough and really working, though i have the
tendency to slack and take that 'own time own
target' for granted.
i should seriously count myself lucky. because
i meet nice people almost everywhere i go. people
who are willing to coach and give me help. and i
had never read as much books i had before like
now.
some times i wonder, if some people genuinely
want you to succeed, or just cant wait to see you
fail and watch you tumbling from wherever you
have climbed to. still, i dont mind the looks of
askance, i may be slow in learning. but, i wanna
reach for my pinnacle.
and of course, for those who always feel that
are superior for some reasons or so. think again,
when you wanna feel that superiority, dont even
let others sense that inferiority. unless it makes
you feel better, feel free to do so.
a good friend of mine once asked me what had
happened to me when i was at my lowest, "what
happened to the von i used to know. you always
get to where you want to aint it?" i almost
forgotten the kind of person i was that many was
kinda overwhelmed by that stubborn spirit i had.
thought to myself, how would things be if i had
taken the route of the crowd. but then again, if
im one of the crowd who follows, i wont get
farther than the crowd, aint that so?
okay, perhaps im seeking some for turning points;
one way or another. (:
